I came home today to find MT eating out of the truck again…
I wasn’t upset. I love to see that she gets around the ranch and does typical horsey stuff – like stealing hay out of the truck.
The most fun for me was knowing that I fed her from the hay in the truck this morning… and instead of her eating that hay, she preferred to steal the same hay out of the truck. Atta girl!
As I gazed upon the Queen, I noted that she was again, as always, covered in shavings and full of dust.
So, I decided to groom her.
–Don’t get me wrong, I groom her often… it just doesn’t last but maybe 10 minutes.
DON’T GROOM ME, PLEBIANS!
When the Grand Dam was showing, she hated to be groomed. It took too much time away from eating, or something. I have no idea.
It was so easy to read her face…
Tess: Do not touch me with those tools, Plebians!
Grooms: C’mon Tess, you are so gorgeous, let us make you more gorgeous.
Tess: Why? I am glorious just as I am. Besides, that stuff stinks.
Grooms: You cannot go into the ring, looking like that!
Tess: Watch me… Do you think that smelly stuff makes me drag that thing around any better?! Now, give me some food while you are in here!
And so it went.
Those grooms were saints. She always looked great – but they paid for it.
GROOMING THE QUEEN NOW…
Grooming Tess now isn’t so bad. She actually likes it.
But, she has trained me that she will throw a tantrum if she isn’t given a treat at the beginning and at the end of each session.
I’m easy to train that way…
MY ARSENAL. GET IN, GET OUT, GET IT DONE.
Here is my arsenal. I always use the same products from Equi-Spa. You all know how much I love THE BALM from EquiSpa. Well, I also love all of these products. Besides the fact that they are all natural and work really well – THEY SMELL GREAT! I love the fragrance. She smells so pretty afterwards! (No affiliation)
GOTTA DO IT QUICKLY!
As you might surmise, MT uses her feet as an excuse to get out of mostly everything. So, while grooming, she constantly shifts her weight and picks up her feet as if this is really hurting her.
I know it isn’t true. Her feet weren’t hurting her before we started grooming…
But, I play along … I spend half my time putting her movable spongy mats under each foot, cooing to her “Oh Mama, this must be so difficult for you, you poor girl, having to be groomed, such an injustice…” as she shifts around. I think she enjoys this game.
Anyway, I was able to refresh her coat, detangle and shine up her mane and tail, I cleaned her udder and private parts, I de-itched the itchy spots and cleaned up her delicate under eye areas.
She looked dreamy to me.
And, if she were to say so herself, she was very proud afterwards.
The grooming she hates but the fawning, she loves.
OF COURSE, THE TREAT TANTRUM
Keeping to her true self, the girl would not stand still for the final photo.
Tess: Nope. I WILL NOT stand still for that camera unless you give me my Treat (and make it ReNew Gold, if you are smart).
OUR DISCUSSION. SHE WINS, OF COURSE.
Me: Fine, just hold still and I’ll grab a photo and then go get your treat.
Tess: N-O-W, OR ELSE!
Me: C’mon, just let me (as she dances around..) get… this… one… shot. Aw for criminysakes, Mare! Stand still! Ho!
Tess: “Ho” rhymes with NO! NO. I won’t stand still without a treat. Gimme my TREAT!
And so I did.
And she stood still for the final pic.
Oh, and the treat was, of course, ReNew Gold.
MAMA TESS’ FINAL EXTRAVAGANZA is offering an incredible deal on Diamond jewelry and 40% OFF (BRAND NEW ITEMS!!) OF EVERYTHING ELSE- TIME TO PAY OFF THIS MEDICAL DEBT FOR GOOD!